Amidst the Darkness of My mind

There are times when I close my eyes
And the world outside seems hard to bear
I reach into a dream-grasping for something real
There's nothing but despair
I live my life...I laugh...I cry
I never knew the words to say
Sometimes I wished that I could fly
To be Anywhere ...just to be away
I remember my eyes
Whispers in the wind as the lashes flutter
A Soft Delicate caress as the eyelids lower silently
So many moments of dreams
So many times when I cried
So many memories I tried to forget with my eyes tightly shut
I always remember
I remember the firsts
I remember the lasts
I recall every in between, both present and past
I am sure you remember too...but maybe not as much
Maybe the pain is too much for you to remember
I remember
I spend my life remembering
I open my eyes
But even then I'm not safe from the memories
I hear and see and smell
And everything reminds me of moments since gone by
I lay awake and softly cry
These tears not shed for me are tears no less of joy than pain
I cry in silence
Nothing more
I cry alone until they fall asleep
The birds are they that fall asleep
My tears nestle with the birds
And they arise with the morning sun
Each ray illuminating yet another painful moment
I wish to dream of something more
To sleep a delicious sleep (a yummy sleep)
Under the watch of guardian angels
Tears are wiped away
For lovely moments pass behind
All that once was sad is changed within one simple dream
I close my eyes and ponder all of God's great plans for me
I wonder if I have kept his plan my own
When it's the end I'll grow to know if all has been done correctly
I will slowly learn the truth
The truth reveals secrets
Secrets I'm scared to share with you and you with me
For you to know these things I see...the life I live...the way I feel
What to do...where to go...how to feel
I live upon an elected mound of happiness
I love to be around you
I love to have you in my dreams
For you arrive and all my worries drift into infinity



Melodie Brooke Libby
June 2nd 2009